Lately I have been thinking a lot about how I want my kids to be givers, not receivers. I want them to think outside of their four walls about other children who are less fortunate and may even go to bed hungry.
While everyone likes to receive things, there is a difference in receiving and being a receiver. I personally want myself and family to be the people who GIVE to people in need. With that said, I have come up with a little challenge for anyone who wants to participate. For the next 40 days we are going to challenge ourselves to give something away every single day. I am not talking about donating stuff we don't need to the poor, because we should do that anyways. Giving something away that is valuable is what this is all about. It could be as simple as paying for the persons drink in the line behind you at Starbucks, or donating some of your time volunteering. You reap what you sow and while some days you might find if difficult to give when you barely have yourself, do it anyway.
I am going to keep a log of the cool experiences I have along the way, and I encourage you to do the same! See you in 40 days!
“The harvest is great, but the workers are few. So pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send more workers into his fields.” Matthew 9:38
Bye bye baby belly!
As parents, we want to do our absolute best for our children and often times neglect ourselves in the process. We don't have time to exercise or eat right because we are so busy taking care of everyone else. The problem with this is that our children will follow in our footsteps. If we live an unhealthy lifestyle our children will also. After having Hazel I found myself to be constantly exhausted, I felt like everyone was sucking the life right out of me. I have always worked out, but in the last month or so I have gotten serious about making it a priority.. These are the things I have done to get myself healthy:
-Eat when I wake up (usually a hard boiled egg.) I like to do my workout first thing in the morning so this gives me the protein I need to get my through it.
-Eat a lot of small meals throughout the day. I go grocery shopping every weekend and stock up on healthy snacks (granola bars, lunch meat, nuts, fruit, veggies, and cheese.) If you don't have healthy things available to munch on throughout the day you may be tempted to go through a drive thru and get a burger or something. Most people eat bad out of convenience.
-No food after 7pm! Water only!
-Jillian Micheals 30 day shred- best workout DVD ever! After 20 days I am on the hardest level and getting amazing results (and I can do it in my pjs!)
-Drowning myself with water (at a minimum, 12 cups a day)
I now have the energy to keep up with two kids and sleep better at night than I have in a long time. I am not going to tell you it is easy, but the hard work definitely pays off!! I am more confident than ever and motivated by my results.
I also suggest picking a date that you want to achieve your results by and when you feel like giving up, remember that date! Even if it means planning a night away with your significant other as a reward to yourself, that can be your motivation! In the process you will become a better parent because you are leading by example and setting your family up for a healthy life! Good luck, and I would love to hear about your success!
-Eat when I wake up (usually a hard boiled egg.) I like to do my workout first thing in the morning so this gives me the protein I need to get my through it.
-Eat a lot of small meals throughout the day. I go grocery shopping every weekend and stock up on healthy snacks (granola bars, lunch meat, nuts, fruit, veggies, and cheese.) If you don't have healthy things available to munch on throughout the day you may be tempted to go through a drive thru and get a burger or something. Most people eat bad out of convenience.
-No food after 7pm! Water only!
-Jillian Micheals 30 day shred- best workout DVD ever! After 20 days I am on the hardest level and getting amazing results (and I can do it in my pjs!)
-Drowning myself with water (at a minimum, 12 cups a day)
I now have the energy to keep up with two kids and sleep better at night than I have in a long time. I am not going to tell you it is easy, but the hard work definitely pays off!! I am more confident than ever and motivated by my results.
(Please excuse my messy closet)
I also suggest picking a date that you want to achieve your results by and when you feel like giving up, remember that date! Even if it means planning a night away with your significant other as a reward to yourself, that can be your motivation! In the process you will become a better parent because you are leading by example and setting your family up for a healthy life! Good luck, and I would love to hear about your success!
Getting Started with Healthy Living!
Recently I have had a lot of people ask me for my sources of information for vaccine information and natural medicine. I decided to compile some of the info I have in one spot for people to reference when searching for answers.
Books:
Vaccine Epidemic by Louise Kuo Habakus MA, Mary Holland
Vaccine Illusion by Tetyana Obukhanych, Ph.D. in immunology
Doctor of the Future by Dan Yachter
Louder Than Words by Jenny McCarthy
Websites:
http://drtenpenny.com/default.aspx
http://www.naturalnews.com/vaccines.html
http://www.nvic.org/
http://novaxdoctors.webs.com/doctorlist.htm
http://www.novaccine.com/
http://www.know-vaccines.org/
This is a good well rounded start, but believe me there are plenty more resources!!!! The most important thing about this subject is doing your OWN research and not just taking other people's word for it. Even your doctor or pediatrician may not have very much detailed information. There is no doctor better than a parent. Do not be motivated by fear but rememeber knowledge is power. It may seem overwhelming, but just take one thing at a time and make the best decision for your family.
:) Courtney
Books:
Vaccine Epidemic by Louise Kuo Habakus MA, Mary Holland
Vaccine Illusion by Tetyana Obukhanych, Ph.D. in immunology
Doctor of the Future by Dan Yachter
Louder Than Words by Jenny McCarthy
Websites:
http://drtenpenny.com/default.aspx
http://www.naturalnews.com/vaccines.html
http://www.nvic.org/
http://novaxdoctors.webs.com/doctorlist.htm
http://www.novaccine.com/
http://www.know-vaccines.org/
This is a good well rounded start, but believe me there are plenty more resources!!!! The most important thing about this subject is doing your OWN research and not just taking other people's word for it. Even your doctor or pediatrician may not have very much detailed information. There is no doctor better than a parent. Do not be motivated by fear but rememeber knowledge is power. It may seem overwhelming, but just take one thing at a time and make the best decision for your family.
:) Courtney
Baby Boundaries
I don't know about everyone else, but when it comes to my job as a parent I take it very seriously. Almost too seriously. I get stressed out about the dumbest things, and want to make the absolute BEST decisions for my kids at all times. I spend hours researching random stuff, looking for fun crafts, shopping for the healthiest food, reading parenting books and looking for answers to every question that pops into my head. It gets to a point where I become overwhelmed and if a kid is sad or mad or bored for any reason I feel like I am failing as a parent. I know that may sound ridiculous, but being a parent is my most important job and I want to give my all.
In the last couple days I came to the realization that in order to be the best possible parent I can't be stressed or overwhelmed. I need balance. For me this balance comes in the form of setting boundaries with my kids. I have put together a little list of things that I think are important in order for parents to keep their sanity. Everyone knows, if mama ain't happy, nobody is happy.
1. When going to the bathroom close and LOCK the door- What a concept, huh? I promise you, they will survive out there.
2. Consistent bedtimes- Putting kids to bed early is not only beneficial to them, but you will be amazed how nice it is to have some "you" time.
3. Quiet time- During the day when you are going to lose your mind, send everyone to their room (or playpen) for at least 30 minutes so you can catch your breath.
4. Demand a regular date night!- My husband can tell when I need a night out because I get super cranky. It is a wonderful thing to get dolled up and spend time with the one you love.
5. Take a shower!!- I make a point of taking a shower and doing a little makeup every single day. After all, I am a woman too, not just a mom.
6. Make this list longer!- Don't be afraid to put yourself first once in a while. Set boundaries with your kids and stick to them.
While your world does revolve around your kids most of the time, it is important not to lose sight of who you are and what you love! Make time for hobbies and friends, and the end result will be a more fulfilled parent who can live up to their fullest potential!
In the last couple days I came to the realization that in order to be the best possible parent I can't be stressed or overwhelmed. I need balance. For me this balance comes in the form of setting boundaries with my kids. I have put together a little list of things that I think are important in order for parents to keep their sanity. Everyone knows, if mama ain't happy, nobody is happy.
1. When going to the bathroom close and LOCK the door- What a concept, huh? I promise you, they will survive out there.
2. Consistent bedtimes- Putting kids to bed early is not only beneficial to them, but you will be amazed how nice it is to have some "you" time.
3. Quiet time- During the day when you are going to lose your mind, send everyone to their room (or playpen) for at least 30 minutes so you can catch your breath.
4. Demand a regular date night!- My husband can tell when I need a night out because I get super cranky. It is a wonderful thing to get dolled up and spend time with the one you love.
5. Take a shower!!- I make a point of taking a shower and doing a little makeup every single day. After all, I am a woman too, not just a mom.
6. Make this list longer!- Don't be afraid to put yourself first once in a while. Set boundaries with your kids and stick to them.
While your world does revolve around your kids most of the time, it is important not to lose sight of who you are and what you love! Make time for hobbies and friends, and the end result will be a more fulfilled parent who can live up to their fullest potential!
Victim or victorious?!
We have all met "that" person. The one who doesn't want anyone to rain on their pity party parade. The one who doesn't want you to offer a solution because they enjoy being the victim. A victim always gets screwed and someone else is always in the wrong. They feed off the attention they get from a "horrible" situation or circumstance. There are two types of people, victims and those who are victorious.
At some point in our lives we are all victims. Bad stuff happens to everyone, and you are defined by how you handle this bad stuff, not whether or not it happens to you. Victims will wallow in a pool of self pity forever until the next bad thing happens to wallow in, but a victorious person gets mad, cries, yells and pulls them self together. Being a victim is a mentality. If you consider yourself to be one, then you always will be.
To be perfectly honest, today I had a crappy thing happen to me. Someday when it is a closed case (literally) I will elaborate in my step parenting diaries but for now we will just call it a crappy thing. When said thing happened I was mad as hell. Here I am putting my heart and soul into being the best possible parent and step parent and not only is it unappreciated, but it is threatened. I know, I know poor me. Woe is me, I do my best and still don't get anything for it except for government officials knocking on my door. NO! I cried, got mad, but then I realized that none of that was going to change anything. I know in my heart that I am doing what is right for my kids and on THAT I will stand. I am taking victory over this situation. I will NOT be threatened or fearful, I have given God the control and I know that yet again he will pull through for me. I am victorious.
Many times we are in situations that will make us or break us, and how we react is what decides the outcome. It is ok to be mad or sad, but at some point you have to pull yourself together or you will always be the victim. I don't know about you, but I know I would much rather live victoriously. I used to hate when people would say that you choose your own destiny, but it is true! If you have pity parties nobody wants to come, but a victory party is a lot more fun!!!
Thank you to all my friends and family who love and support me, I could never fight this battle without you and NEVER have I been more grateful!
At some point in our lives we are all victims. Bad stuff happens to everyone, and you are defined by how you handle this bad stuff, not whether or not it happens to you. Victims will wallow in a pool of self pity forever until the next bad thing happens to wallow in, but a victorious person gets mad, cries, yells and pulls them self together. Being a victim is a mentality. If you consider yourself to be one, then you always will be.
To be perfectly honest, today I had a crappy thing happen to me. Someday when it is a closed case (literally) I will elaborate in my step parenting diaries but for now we will just call it a crappy thing. When said thing happened I was mad as hell. Here I am putting my heart and soul into being the best possible parent and step parent and not only is it unappreciated, but it is threatened. I know, I know poor me. Woe is me, I do my best and still don't get anything for it except for government officials knocking on my door. NO! I cried, got mad, but then I realized that none of that was going to change anything. I know in my heart that I am doing what is right for my kids and on THAT I will stand. I am taking victory over this situation. I will NOT be threatened or fearful, I have given God the control and I know that yet again he will pull through for me. I am victorious.
Many times we are in situations that will make us or break us, and how we react is what decides the outcome. It is ok to be mad or sad, but at some point you have to pull yourself together or you will always be the victim. I don't know about you, but I know I would much rather live victoriously. I used to hate when people would say that you choose your own destiny, but it is true! If you have pity parties nobody wants to come, but a victory party is a lot more fun!!!
Thank you to all my friends and family who love and support me, I could never fight this battle without you and NEVER have I been more grateful!
Know your place!
When first entering the world of step parenting I was reluctant. I didn't know what my role should be in my step daughter, Breanna's life. Things became clearer to me after having my daughter. I realized that it was not fair for me to take a back seat in my step daughters life yet give myself 100% to my own daughter. It is not right for Breanna to suffer because of her parents incompatibility.
I remember being so scared to step on anyones toes. I was afraid to give all because I knew that would mean pissing some people off. I was torn because I knew what was best for Breanna in her life over here with us, but didn't want to over step the boundaries. In getting to know my husband better, and realizing what he wanted for his daughter and for our new family I felt more confident in my role. I know now that the best thing I can do is treat her as if she were my own. It is not my job to worry about pleasing her mother, my husband's family or my family. My job is to do my very best, for both Breanna and our family and if that means stepping on some toes, then so be it. No decision regarding Breanna ever effects just her. It effects all of us.
Has this caused some waves? Yes, but that is ok. I sleep well at night because I know that I am doing everything in my power to have a happy, healthy family. Nothing worth doing is ever easy and I know that someday all the energy I have put into Breanna will be rewarded. Step parents need all the support they can get so the best way to be a good one is to block out all the negative people! Stand your ground, fight for your family, and surround yourself with people who build you up, not break you down. I want to encourage the step parents out there to follow their heart and do your absolute best. If your best makes people mad, sounds like a personal issue they need to deal with. Your loyalty was never to them anyways! Much love friends!
I remember being so scared to step on anyones toes. I was afraid to give all because I knew that would mean pissing some people off. I was torn because I knew what was best for Breanna in her life over here with us, but didn't want to over step the boundaries. In getting to know my husband better, and realizing what he wanted for his daughter and for our new family I felt more confident in my role. I know now that the best thing I can do is treat her as if she were my own. It is not my job to worry about pleasing her mother, my husband's family or my family. My job is to do my very best, for both Breanna and our family and if that means stepping on some toes, then so be it. No decision regarding Breanna ever effects just her. It effects all of us.
Has this caused some waves? Yes, but that is ok. I sleep well at night because I know that I am doing everything in my power to have a happy, healthy family. Nothing worth doing is ever easy and I know that someday all the energy I have put into Breanna will be rewarded. Step parents need all the support they can get so the best way to be a good one is to block out all the negative people! Stand your ground, fight for your family, and surround yourself with people who build you up, not break you down. I want to encourage the step parents out there to follow their heart and do your absolute best. If your best makes people mad, sounds like a personal issue they need to deal with. Your loyalty was never to them anyways! Much love friends!
When the fit hits the shan.
I believe there are certain rules when it comes to discipline and step parenting. I know that being a step parent to older children is a totally different ball game, but getting into the child's life at a younger age brings different challenges. When the kids are older (as I was when my mom remarried) the step parent is more of a friend and not so much like a "parent." In my opinion that is the way it should be because the children already have a "mom" and "dad" that they answer to and do not need a new person coming in trying to change that. I don't believe it is ok for the step parent to do the disciplining in this case. When someone is dating a person with older children, they need to decide before thinking about marriage if they can handle the way things are without coming in and trying to change everything.
What about with younger ones? In this case the struggles are not going to be with the child because they will never remember a time without you. I have no issues getting my step daughter to listen to me (actually sometimes she listens to me better than her father, hehe.) The relationship with a step child should be a strong one before you think about any sort of discipline. Of course every family has their own ways of disciplining their child and while I may give my daughter Hazel a smack on the hand or butt, I am not going to do that with Breanna. Why? Well it is a personal thing. My husband wouldn't do it either, and we are able to get results from putting her in her room or taking away a privilege. I have to admit, I am really lucky to have such a well behaved step child. Don't get me wrong, she has her moments where she tries to be the boss, but we get her in check real quick. Until I was comfortable with Breanna's and my relationship I would play tattle tale to daddy to get her to listen, but now we have a mutual respect for each other and she knows I mean business.
What about with younger ones? In this case the struggles are not going to be with the child because they will never remember a time without you. I have no issues getting my step daughter to listen to me (actually sometimes she listens to me better than her father, hehe.) The relationship with a step child should be a strong one before you think about any sort of discipline. Of course every family has their own ways of disciplining their child and while I may give my daughter Hazel a smack on the hand or butt, I am not going to do that with Breanna. Why? Well it is a personal thing. My husband wouldn't do it either, and we are able to get results from putting her in her room or taking away a privilege. I have to admit, I am really lucky to have such a well behaved step child. Don't get me wrong, she has her moments where she tries to be the boss, but we get her in check real quick. Until I was comfortable with Breanna's and my relationship I would play tattle tale to daddy to get her to listen, but now we have a mutual respect for each other and she knows I mean business.
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