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Baby Boundaries

I don't know about everyone else, but when it comes to my job as a parent I take it very seriously. Almost too seriously. I get stressed out about the dumbest things, and want to make the absolute BEST decisions for my kids at all times. I spend hours researching random stuff, looking for fun crafts, shopping for the healthiest food, reading parenting books and looking for answers to every question that pops into my head. It gets to a point where I become overwhelmed and if a kid is sad or mad or bored for any reason I feel like I am failing as a parent. I know that may sound ridiculous, but being a parent is my most important job and I want to give my all.

In the last couple days I came to the realization that in order to be the best possible parent I can't be stressed or overwhelmed. I need balance. For me this balance comes in the form of setting boundaries with my kids. I have put together a little list of things that I think are important in order for parents to keep their sanity. Everyone knows, if mama ain't happy, nobody is happy.

1. When going to the bathroom close and LOCK the door- What a concept, huh? I promise you, they will survive out there.
2. Consistent bedtimes- Putting kids to bed early is not only beneficial to them, but you will be amazed how nice it is to have some "you" time.
3. Quiet time- During the day when you are going to lose your mind, send everyone to their room (or playpen) for at least 30 minutes so you can catch your breath.
4. Demand a regular date night!- My husband can tell when I need a night out because I get super cranky. It is a wonderful thing to get dolled up and spend time with the one you love.
5. Take a shower!!- I make a point of taking a shower and doing a little makeup every single day. After all, I am a woman too, not just a mom.
6. Make this list longer!- Don't be afraid to put yourself first once in a while. Set boundaries with your kids and stick to them.

While your world does revolve around your kids most of the time, it is important not to lose sight of who you are and what you love! Make time for hobbies and friends, and the end result will be a more fulfilled parent who can live up to their fullest potential!

Victim or victorious?!

We have all met "that" person. The one who doesn't want anyone to rain on their pity party parade. The one who doesn't want you to offer a solution because they enjoy being the victim. A victim always gets screwed and someone else is always in the wrong. They feed off the attention they get from a "horrible" situation or circumstance. There are two types of people, victims and those who are victorious.

At some point in our lives we are all victims. Bad stuff happens to everyone, and you are defined by how you handle this bad stuff, not whether or not it happens to you. Victims will wallow in a pool of self pity forever until the next bad thing happens to wallow in, but a victorious person gets mad, cries, yells and pulls them self together. Being a victim is a mentality. If you consider yourself to be one, then you always will be.

To be perfectly honest, today I had a crappy thing happen to me. Someday when it is a closed case (literally) I will elaborate in my step parenting diaries but for now we will just call it a crappy thing. When said thing happened I was mad as hell. Here I am putting my heart and soul into being the best possible parent and step parent and not only is it unappreciated, but it is threatened. I know, I know poor me. Woe is me, I do my best and still don't get anything for it except for government officials knocking on my door. NO! I cried, got mad, but then I realized that none of that was going to change anything. I know in my heart that I am doing what is right for my kids and on THAT I will stand. I am taking victory over this situation. I will NOT be threatened or fearful, I have given God the control and I know that yet again he will pull through for me. I am victorious.

Many times we are in situations that will make us or break us, and how we react is what decides the outcome. It is ok to be mad or sad, but at some point you have to pull yourself together or you will always be the victim. I don't know about you, but I know I would much rather live victoriously. I used to hate when people would say that you choose your own destiny, but it is true! If you have pity parties nobody wants to come, but a victory party is a lot more fun!!!

Thank you to all my friends and family who love and support me, I could never fight this battle without you and NEVER have I been more grateful!

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