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I WAS IN PRISON DOCUMENTARY

Insert foot in mouth

I will admit that one of my biggest struggles is controlling my mouth. I can think of all kinds of lovely things to say when I am mad, hurt, or just down right pissed off. A lot of the time I will say what I am feeling with absolutely no filter. Over the years I have become aware of this and tried to tame the beast, but once in a while it rears its ugly head. Today was one of those days.

I got news from my friend earlier today telling me that one of her friends she has had since 3rd grade passed away from cancer. She left behind a husband and baby who is not even one years old. This broke my heart. I had been highly aggravated from some of the days events, but this just stopped me in my tracks. All the anger and frustration from these little, ridiculous issues calmed down and I realized how dumb it all really is in the long run. How selfish am I? I should be thanking God for this very day and appreciating the fact that my almost one year old isn't going to lose her mommy to such an awful disease, and instead little nonsense stuff is burdening my thoughts.

This information sobered my mind and I realized that I don't need to defend myself or my family to anyone. All the judgements that people put on me are just going to fall at their feet. I am not going to throw my pearls before swine. No more. I am not going to open my big fat mouth even when I have something that I think is REALLY good. I know that I have placed my life, health and family in God's hands and at the end of the day he will fight for me, and do a much better job.

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