I WAS IN PRISON DOCUMENTARY

Change of heart... (especially for wifeys!)

One of the lessons I have learned lately is that no matter how hard you try or what you do, you CANNOT change other people. Sounds simple, right? Well duh, everyone knows you can't change people, but do people change?

I believe that people can change, but not because you forced them to. That sort of change is never permanent. If you spend your entire life waiting for someone to change and nagging them to do so, you are going to have a miserable existence. The only way to be happy is to realize that the only person you can control is yourself.

I cannot believe the amount of time I have wasted getting mad at people because they aren't what I expect them to be. It is even harder when the person or people's decisions directly effect you. I have so many people in my life that I wish were different, but I have finally come to terms with the fact that until there is a change within themselves, I must move on. You want someone to change? Spend more time on your knees praying for TRUE internal change and less time nagging, worrying or arguing. Take the time you usually would spend doing that, and pray for the person. That is the very most you can do.

This is particularly true for wives! I have had a couple of friends confide in me in the last few weeks about their husbands, and frustrations they have with them. "I wish he would do (blank) differently" or "I wish he would not do (blank) anymore".. It is not weird for a wife to feel this way. I have felt this way with my husband lots of times. I have also learned that trying to tell him how he "needs" to do things does NOT work and actually just causes tension between us. I have also realized that in the past there are some decisions he has made, that I didn't agree with at the time, that have turned out to work out in our family's best interest.

Change comes from the heart. The best advice wives, is to just shut your mouth. When you want to nag or complain to him about something he is doing, just don't. Pray about it instead. This is the ONLY way you will see true change from the heart. Think about it... Has your nagging and anger worked thus far? Probably not. If it has, I guarantee you it is only temporary change. This is true with anyone in your life, not just husbands. This applies to your kids, difficult family members, whoever!

Letting go is the most freeing and wonderful experience ever! Give it a try, I would love to hear your success stories! xxoo

Beat the mommy blues!

I am now 9 days post pardum and have had a totally different experience this time than I did having my daughter two years ago. My baby boy is healthy and perfect, but decided to come down the birth canal hand/arm first and could not be delivered naturally without breaking bones.

Needless to say, I had a c-section and find the recovery to be literally 10 times more difficult. I see why God did not create us to have our guts split open to deliver a baby, but this is one of the few times I am truly thankful for modern medicine.

Right now, I am smack in the middle of crazy hormones, pain, breastfeeding, and falling in love with a new little soul. I am not suffering from post pardum depression, but I know many moms do, and I want to give a little insight as to how I keep my spirits up despite my raging hormones. These things all apply to the first year of mommyhood as well...

1. Get up, take a shower, put on a little makeup, and put on something besides PJ's. So simple, but will make you feel like a woman again, not just a mommy with a screwed up body. Hehe.

2. Force yourself to engage in non-mommy duties. This could be anything from going to coffee with a friend or engaging in a hobby. For me, it is my business, and blogging of course. As soon as I was feeling half human (about a week post pardum) I continued emailing, scheduling classes and reaching out to new contacts.

 If you are a stay at home mama, as I am, then I encourage you to find something that you love and start doing it. Even if its just something crafty. I sell essential oils, they are medical grade and can treat any illness under the sun. They have been a huge part of my recovery and my children's overall health. For more info on the oils email me at ylessentialoilmama@gmail.com

3. Let it go. Don't let people get to you. Everyone will probably annoy you with the drop of a hat, but just make the decision to keep your mouth shut and let it go. I promise you that you will have a much more peaceful experience doing this. Your husband will be especially thankful for this too, remember, he is adjusting as well, but doesn't have the hormones to go with it.

4. Exercise. When your body is healed and ready to conquer the world again, start an exercise routine and continue to make yourself a priority. Get your hair done, get your nails done, and buy yourself a cute shirt here and there!

My biggest pet peeve is that moms think they have an excuse to let themselves go just because they have had children. You are a mommy, and you have now accomplished the best thing a woman can achieve, why not look like a rockstar too?! This is another pointer that your husband will appreciate.

 
Me and my new little boo.

Women's Empowerment Part 1

Women's Empowerment Part 2

Women's Empowerment part 3

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